WASHINGTON, DC–A new Fox News / Rasmussen poll has found that nearly 65% of registered voters agreed or strongly agreed that “President Trump is focused on the issues that matter.”
The poll came after an energetic weekend for the president, in which he made headlines for repeatedly criticizing NFL players for bad posture during the national anthem. The resulting controversy had fans across the nation choosing sides in the debate, and a majority has sided with the president.*
Tom Cantor, a Republican strategist with Fox News, said that the poll is a vindication of President Trump’s unconventional approach to the Oval Office. “A lesser president might have gotten distracted by fringe issues like double-digit healthcare inflation, the $20 trillion national debt, the looming pension crisis, or the fact that US troops are still getting maimed and killed in countries that only about five Americans can find on a map,” Cantor noted. “But not President Trump. The president remains laser-focused on the key issues that affect Americans every single Sunday, for a small part of the year.”
Cantor also said that he was pleased with the president’s efforts on #StandForTheAnthem so far. But he, and “many other voters”, hope that President Trump expands his critique to other people that violate social mores, including baseball players that don’t roll up their pants, that guy who inexplicably sits in the student section, and people who don’t say “Amen” loudly after a public prayer.
“It’s about respect,” Cantor explained.
*This is a satirical post. The poll, quotes, and source cited above are all fictional. Actual polls on the NFL scandal suggest that a majority overall do not want to see the NFL players fired but that a majority of Republicans would support that outcome.